Nov 20th Sat
hi all. i just thought i'd write something about today's session.
i felt i really benefited from the 'talk' we had after the official session was over. the observations of how everyone basically normally reacts, acts, etc were very helpful. i mean, things that are so plain for others to see can be the best kept secret to ourselves innit? and today was a perfect example of how true that is.
i guess i do get into 'puppy' mode as a self defense mechanism. it's the most positive side of me. that's why i come across very 'happy-happy, cute' etc. and i guess part of me believes that that is the side of me that people would want to 'work' with. my friends know my more serious side or as david calls it - my "online persona". and i bitch sometimes about how artificial theater can be sometimes and here i am propogating that artificiality by only subjecting a certain specific side of me. all this while - i thought i was going at it "on the edge" because when i get into 'puppy-dog' mode - i'm game for anything. but that's not the way it should be done is it?
thanks for helping me figure that out guys.
here on in - in the sessions to come - i'll make a conscious effort to be 'serious' and be in control of all that 'energy'. then i can start playing roles that i do really want to play. the serious ones. the silent strong types. the regular joe types. as vic told me today, he said he'd like to see me play a person having a regular type of serious conversations about life. serious stuff that i think people like ariff, theresa, azhar and the like always potray. i'm gonna give those a go. :D
as for the evaluation coming up - i'm not really nervous - this whole thing is a learning experience. there's no place for 'fear' in that sense doncha think? :)
anyway - don't worry lah y'all.
p/s: thanks for listening to my songs and giving me motivation to keep at it.
laters.
i felt i really benefited from the 'talk' we had after the official session was over. the observations of how everyone basically normally reacts, acts, etc were very helpful. i mean, things that are so plain for others to see can be the best kept secret to ourselves innit? and today was a perfect example of how true that is.
i guess i do get into 'puppy' mode as a self defense mechanism. it's the most positive side of me. that's why i come across very 'happy-happy, cute' etc. and i guess part of me believes that that is the side of me that people would want to 'work' with. my friends know my more serious side or as david calls it - my "online persona". and i bitch sometimes about how artificial theater can be sometimes and here i am propogating that artificiality by only subjecting a certain specific side of me. all this while - i thought i was going at it "on the edge" because when i get into 'puppy-dog' mode - i'm game for anything. but that's not the way it should be done is it?
thanks for helping me figure that out guys.
here on in - in the sessions to come - i'll make a conscious effort to be 'serious' and be in control of all that 'energy'. then i can start playing roles that i do really want to play. the serious ones. the silent strong types. the regular joe types. as vic told me today, he said he'd like to see me play a person having a regular type of serious conversations about life. serious stuff that i think people like ariff, theresa, azhar and the like always potray. i'm gonna give those a go. :D
as for the evaluation coming up - i'm not really nervous - this whole thing is a learning experience. there's no place for 'fear' in that sense doncha think? :)
anyway - don't worry lah y'all.
p/s: thanks for listening to my songs and giving me motivation to keep at it.
laters.
1 Comments:
You're quite right there - other's observations are rather invaluable. In fact, it took me a good 7 weeks of other's observations to realise in full that I am a control freak.
I always tend to lead (and not neccessarily to the best of things, mind you) and can't exactly follow well. It's a character flaw.
Sums, don't snigger. Hehe.
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