Dear Mum & Dad,
Yang, please read the following with an open mind and do not be angered by it. Just ponder and decide only after your exam is over.
We did have a discussion about you last week and we all (including the girls) feel that it will be good if you can join us in Auckland. Household expenses will work out better since food and house is already catered for. We have two cars there which you can use. Besides, your presence there will bring much comfort to me and the girls, esp for me since I will be in a very unfamiliar surroundings!!. To your dad, he will feel much better here knowing that you are there with us.
I'm sorry but I am not willing to consider joining you all in Auckland other than a short break. Regarding Household expenses etc, I think that to not be an important issue. Trust me, I do miss you all, but I don't want to live in Auckland. It's not that I have an affinity or a predisposition for Malaysia or against New Zealand, it's just that of all the places I've lived in, KL still feels most like 'home' to me, whilst Cardiff comes a close 2nd.
Perhaps you think that I should be swayed by the fact that I should be closer to our family, geographically and I suspect, emotively. But I have always been independent, since very young, and to curb that natural instinct now, when I am just easing into adulthood proper seems to me to be such a regressive step to take that it just supersedes that 'sway' that I should be facing.
Having spent the 3 years studying for a law degree, you should at the very least give yourself a chance to put what you have studied to practice. I have faith and confidence that you will become a very good and talented lawyer. Just mark my words..only thing now is do you want to give yourself this chance? It will be our dream come true, really!. Working hours and life there will be much better than home.
Let's try not to bring this up again, okay? The original deal was that I would read the law degree, on consideration that I can decide what to do thereafter. I do not have the want nor drive to qualify as a lawyer anymore, as I realise now that I have many other interests more dear to me, most of which are plausible career options.
You know I can't stand what officially is a 9-5 job, but in reality is more like a 7-11, 6-7 days a week position. Worse still would be to be stuck practising Law, which I am rapidly losing interest in. I agree, the money is good, but it surely isn't the be all and and all. Definitely not for me, anyway.
Regardless of what I decide to do back in KL, one thing is definite - my opportunities lie in KL, not Auckland nor UK. Be it taking up a Junior Consultant position at the IP firm or to take up a position with the soon to be opened KLPAC (Kuala Lumpur Performing Arts Centre) - the most advanced theatre in the Asian region, or just sticking with my dear little theatre company - which I have big plans for, some of which I'd already set in motion this Summer past; or even to take on Chef-dom more seriously as a plausible career - having worked in a 5* establishment for 9 months by the time I get back.
It is obvious to me, as it should to you, that I am but 21, yet I have a big world open to me in KL, in various fields, all of which I truly enjoy. The closest I will come to practising Law is to take up the Consultancy's offer.
Okay?
We all know that you wish to continue with your company but all we ask of you is to give yourself a chance. Who knows, besides the law firm job, you might be able to work something similar over there in your spare time. I know how restless you can be whenever you have time on your hand. You are a person with unlimited talent and energy - you will succeed if you put your mind to it.
My feeling is that I will stick with my theatre company for quite a while more, as I think I'm going to make something out of it and more importantly, something out of me and my partners, in the local industry. It may take me a couple of years, but I am confident that I will get there.
Money at the end of it all IS important, I can't deny that, but I think I've got NOTHING to lose, at all, to try my hand at what I truly want - to retire having my own theatre and academy, as well as to be a Restauranteur. I'd rather risk it now, then never at all. When I am 30 or 40, perhaps having a family and millions of other responsibilities, I will not be able to anymore, and I will not have that.
So please, asking me to join you in Auckland is one thing, but to keep bluntly coaxing me to enter a profession I do not wish to is another thing in entirety - which I do not appreciate at all. It is also useless to ask you to step into my shoes and try to appreciate where I am coming from, because you both grew up in different times and arguably in conditions where necessity was the order of the day and the luxury of opportunities much scarcer then what I am currently having.
Other than the various options highlighted above, there is also a good chance for me to get a Masters in Directing or Fine Arts (MFA) or a related discipline on scholarship. With that Masters degree, I may also able to apply for a Lecturer's position in Performing Arts, which would be SO cool.
I've slogged away nearly 7 years in KL's theatre industry, starting as a nobody to becoming someone who can throw a little weight around today, not just someone who's taking the piss out of a road-blocked career. I am not going to let all my hardwork go down the drain just like that.
Look, at the end of it, it's quite simple. I don't know what I will do when I get back to KL. But what I do know is that I AM going back to KL and NOT going to be practicing as an Advocate & Solicitor. I reckon that I would be able to last 3-6 months at least after working at the Hotel after my exams till my Visa ends, perhaps without working for anyone at all. I would go travelling, but obviously saving it up for a rainy day is a better idea, for now.
I'm sorry if you are upset by this email. Be that as it may, I have said what I have to say, and hope that you will respect my plans. I am 21 going to 22. I do not wish to stay in the middle-class bracket for the entire duration of my lifetime; rather, I reckon it is time to live my life the way I want it, or I never will. How and whether I get there or not, it'll be my own successes or mistakes which shall determine it - no one else's.
Yang
